Ten Etiquette Rules for Children

Teaching manners to your children gives them the tools to function and succeed as adults. Ann Marie Sabath, author of Business Etiquette: 101 Ways to Conduct Business with Charm and Savvy, says that children should know these ten rules of etiquette.

1. How to Dine
When invited to a pre-arranged meal, always use your utensils from the "outside in." After all, utensils are set in the order that food will be served.
2. Telephone Manners
When calling a friend, identify yourself to the person who answers the phone before asking to speak your friend. By doing so, the parents or other family member who answer the phone will appreciate this courtesy and see you as friendly.
3. On Correspondence
Anytime it takes someone more than 15 minutes to do something for you, send the person a thank-you note. By doing so, the person will know you really appreciated what was done for you.
4. Be Gracious
When you are sent an invitation that requires an RSVP, be sure to let the person know if you will be able to go to the gathering. After all, "RSVP" means "respond if you please."
5. Shoes Are Important
When getting dressed each day, be sure that your shoes are well-maintained. People associate the way you take care of your shoes with the way you handle detail in the rest of your life.
6. Be Open to New Foods
When you are invited out to eat and are served a food that is not your favorite, try a piece of it anyway. You may be surprised and find that you end up liking it.
7. Ask Questions
When talking with friends and family, always make a point of asking them questions about themselves. People will see you as interesting if you are interested in them.
8. At the Table
When eating a roll, be sure to break off a bite-sized piece at a time. No bread-and-butter sandwiches, please.
9. Be Friendly
When you are in school, be cool by making a point to talk with that new kid in your class. If the tables were turned, wouldn't that make you feel good?
10. The Rule of Twelve
When talking with others, always use a form of thanks and the person's name in the first 12 words you speak ("It's good to see you, Mary," or "Thanks for picking me up from soccer, Dad.") By following this rule of 12, people will want to continue to do nice things for you.

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from oprah.com

What Are You Doing in Front of Your Children? by Jan Tincher

Kids mimic their parents, even if they don't understand what is going on. What are you doing in front of your children?

Do you get angry? What do you do when you are angry? Do you let that anger show, regardless of the consequences?

And what are the consequences? This, perhaps? You have company. The children are playing. Your child gets angry and hurts another child. What has happened here? Friends are very important to children.

Will those children be allowed to play together once the parents of the other kids see that happening "once too many" times? What has happened here? Friends are very important to children.

Do you cheat? Do you cheat, regardless of the consequences?

And what are the consequences? This, perhaps? You have company. The children are playing. Your child cheats at a game and all the kids get upset.

Will those children be allowed to play together once the parents of the other kids see that happening "once too many" times? What has happened here? Friends are very important to children.

And, since friends are very important to children, shouldn't they be very important to you?

What are we telling -- doing in front of -- our kids? We need to tell and show them what is acceptable. Some say, "But they are going to learn it somewhere, sometime." Do you let them swear? Punch someone in the nose? Urinate over the bushes downtown? "They may not have learned it downtown, but that's where they'll probably try it out."

They learn MORE from people they love and respect. They learn FASTER from people they love and respect. They MODEL people they love and respect.

The next time you say or do something in front of your children, or any children for that matter, look at what you are doing and make sure it is something you want or can accept being repeated -- right in front of your eyes.


NOTE:
All is not lost if you do see something you don't like repeated right in front of your eyes. Let your mind go back over your actions and see if YOU were the one who taught them to do that. If so, the next time you are doing it in front of them say something like, "Oh! I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry. I won't do that again, OK?" We all make mistakes. Apologizing is VERY acceptable behavior. Show it to children all the time.

Children live what they've learned. What are you teaching them?
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Copyright 2001, Jan Tincher, All Rights Reserved Worldwide
from selfgrowth.com

Good Manners are a Reflection of Who You Are

Good manners are more than just common courtesy. It's one of the ways people decide what kind of person you are. Good manners are not only a sign of upbringing, respect, and consideration for others. People with good manners are perceived as more intelligent and more caring. Look people straight in the eye when you meet them, smile, offer to help them. Extend a strong, firm hand shake. To do anything less assures that you will not only be perceived as rude and crass, but also weak and frightened.

Avoid using foul language particularly when speaking with adults or when young children are around. If you are still holding tight to the thought that you have a right to "be yourself" and to do anything less makes you a hypocrite, you are stuck in the mindset of the 1960's and it's time your moved forward.

We are not talking about not putting your elbows on the table here, we're talking about treating people decently ... just as you want to be treated. On this particular issue, there is one edict you should remember unless you want to stay in the position you are currently in for the rest of your life. If you want to move into the current century, remember this:

"Being Yourself is Not the Solution. It's the Problem. Learn to Change."